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fshareef
11-11-2006, 02:24 PM
"how does a lover win back the love of a loved one? and if she or he can't, how does the lover remove the love, without hate, and love another?"
-anonymous

just a lil poem... comment if you want. this "question" was posed to me, and i had no idea how to answer it.

on a side note... wasn't it a lil "sunnah" that after we took a class with sh. yaser we'd post poems, or was that somethin only Hayl did?

Sirius1
11-11-2006, 06:51 PM
"how does a lover win back the love of a loved one? and if she or he can't, how does the lover remove the love, without hate, and love another?"
-anonymous

just a lil poem... comment if you want. this "question" was posed to me, and i had no idea how to answer it.I would say...patience, persistance, and dua...for both situations.

Also, if one wants to "remove the love, w/out hate and love another", the person could try to finding a hobby that would keep his/her mind distracted from the beloved's thought for long periods of time. By doing this on a consistent basis the old love should fade away, I would think, (if the love can be forgotten for a little while, it can be forgotten for a longer time, or perhaps, even, forever). Then the person could try loving another.

Before doing all of this, the person needs to Intend to forget.

Thats what I think. I don't know how practical that is.

on a side note... wasn't it a lil "sunnah" that after we took a class with sh. yaser we'd post poems, or was that somethin only Hayl did?You could start a thread called "Love Poems." I predict that it will be very successful, inshaAllah.

~Oum AbdurRahman~
11-13-2006, 01:22 PM
Nice question.

Al Quloob, bi idi Rabbi...

The hearts are between the hand of Allah....

So the only solution is a lot of du3ah and prayer at night.....

Sometimes you can't...sometimes peoples hearts just close just like that.

Asif Alam
11-14-2006, 09:21 PM
"how does a lover win back the love of a loved one? and if she or he can't, how does the lover remove the love, without hate, and love another?"
-anonymous

just a lil poem... comment if you want. this "question" was posed to me, and I had no idea how to answer it.

on a side note... wasn't it a lil "sunnah" that after we took a class with sh. yaser we'd post poems, or was that somethin only Hayl did?
Salaam:

How to win back the love of someone...is easily said then done.

Its my humble opinion, that once an affection is lost, it would be extremely difficult to win it back the way it used to be...thats just human nature...a man would have more challenge to win back his wife's affection, then the other way around....

But, if you must try...and you are willing and able...then you have to tread this long path with shoes of perseverance, with a dress weaved in hope, and a cap full of wisdom and awareness...(and so on)

Also, human's can be easily distracted...so if you were to divert the attention of your significant other (or potential spouse) to somethings or actions that they value and consider important, then perhaps you have a better chance of them seeing you in a different light...this could seed some affection or tenderness in the recipient heart and may bear fruits of love...

and yes, you must encase all this efforts with the blessing and mercy of Allah by asking for his support, help, and resolve to accept the outcome, regardless of what that might be....

If the results comes out to your liking...then Alhamdulillah...you will either get married or patch-up with your spouse..

If the outcome does not yield favorable results...then Alhamdulillah...you will become a philosopher...and you will be smarter next time around!

Allahu Aalim

Ma'Assalaama

Sirius1
11-19-2006, 05:58 PM
On winning the love back:

I think what can be done is...the guilty (or misunderstood) party can empty the contents of their heart in front of the beloved, clear misunderstandings, and offer genuine apologies if he/she is guilty. Once that is done...he/she can verbalize sweet one liners like--"I am only human."

I wouldn't recommend doing this unless one truly and passionately still loves the person.

The remedy would be different if the case is that of betrayal (of love).

Allah Knows Best!