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HiBz EsSenSe ©
02-09-2007, 11:33 PM
Bismillah AlRahman AlRaheem - Jumuah Mubarakah InshaAllah -

¿Did Everyone Feel The Love Today?


Tell us About it, Post Your GEMS here:

Here's OnE of mine is...

"Within the context of 30:21, Allah mentions his favors/signs (Night/Day, Heaven/Earth, Man/Woman) - Putting the concept of Love & Mercy b/w spouses in the same value as the creation of Heaven & Earth....http://forums.almaghrib.org/images/icons/icon7.gif *SubhanAllah*

fawzias
02-10-2007, 12:53 AM
The Arabic language is truly beautiful. Here is one example of the beauty of the language pertaining to the topic of love. The word love in Arabic is made up of the letters ح and ب

ح comes from the throat which is considered to be deep to the point which it makes you choke...like love does. *SubhanAllah...Wow*

craving-jannah
02-10-2007, 05:37 PM
Ya Tayyabah, show us the gems. After almost 1 1/2 days with our beloved Shaikh and...just one gem with 380+ students?!?!
-3rif

Memoona
02-10-2007, 09:09 PM
Ya Tayyabah, show us the gems. After almost 1 1/2 days with our beloved Shaikh and...just one gem with 380+ students?!?!
-3rifwe're too busy absorbing everything the shaykh taught us ... inshAllah more ppl willl post soon as of now this should suffice ....

Some of the ulema' say Allah created Huwwa from the rib of Adam. Not from his head for her to be bossy and not from his feet to be stepped on by him, but from his rib to be close to his heart and under his arm for protection.

QueenGagger
02-10-2007, 09:16 PM
eyes are the windows to the soul...women have better scanners...so don't lie to them

Nadeem R
02-11-2007, 05:31 AM
in caring for your weeping child, there is more reward than praying an entire nite of qiyaam ul lail

in islam, marriage is a partnership not ownership, so the bride keeps her name (unless it carries Shirky connotations)

Memoona
02-11-2007, 09:56 PM
Men and women are to COMPLETE each other not to COMPETE with each other

Brooklyn
02-11-2007, 10:00 PM
In a marrige the husband is the head of the family and the wife is the neck.... where ever the neck goes the head goes

Jannah
02-11-2007, 10:01 PM
Men are like rubberbands, they need their time to stretch out alone and bounce back.

Women are like waves, up & down they go (emotions)...beware sometimes they come in the form of tsunami's.



*rubberbands are useful to keep objects together
*waves are half the beauty of the ocean

Brooklyn
02-11-2007, 10:01 PM
the prophet(saw) used to race with his wife ayisha and play with them. There relatioinship was full of love not just seriousness and strictness.

Brooklyn
02-11-2007, 10:05 PM
According to an activity done in class some of the top 5 loveable actions that husbands want there wives to do are:
1- Cook good tasting food on time
2- make themselves beautiful for thier husbands
3- giving them a massage (yes thats wat they really said)
4- helping them do thier religous actions
5- for the wife not to nag, complain, and appreciate what they do

Brooklyn
02-11-2007, 10:06 PM
There you go im speeding up the process and putting more then 1 :)

Memoona
02-11-2007, 10:11 PM
Brothers Reasons for Delaying marriage*:
1) Because of their Parents (in some way or another)
2) Financial Stability
3) Education
4) Scared of commitment & responsibility; they want their freedom
5) No Halal way of finding good sisters
6) Waiting for older siblings to get married
7) Islamic Ignorance
8) Lack of Tawakkul
9) Fear of having children
10) Visa Issues

*The first 5 are in order of the top five reasons after that there is no specific order

Memoona
02-11-2007, 10:38 PM
Men cope with stress by withdrawing & silence
Women cope with stress by talking about it.

Memoona
02-11-2007, 10:39 PM
Men are motivated and empowered when they feel they are needed
Women are motivated and empowered when they feel cherished

Memoona
02-11-2007, 10:40 PM
Woman express their feelings through words
Men express their feelings through action

Memoona
02-11-2007, 10:42 PM
When the Prophet (sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam) was stressed out he would rush to the salah or he would grab his beard

Memoona
02-11-2007, 10:42 PM
Men talk to relay information
Women talk to start a conversation and build a relationship

Memoona
02-11-2007, 10:43 PM
Not to be needed is a slow death for men

spana3rabia
02-11-2007, 11:07 PM
in caring for your weeping child, there is more reward than praying an entire nite of qiyaam ul lail






SUbhanALlah!! JazakAllah kheiran for sharin this one. imagine how much reward a mother gets. (and i guess some fathers, butmostly mothers)truly Allah is Ar-Rahman. Alhamdulillah..

Imtiaz
02-12-2007, 08:16 AM
This was an aspect (which there are many) of the class that I call...
The Power of the Flower

Your wife, (often, though I feel there has to be lots of exceptions) simply wants gifts from you (Husband, yes you Akhi) to show your appreciation, the price rarely matters.

Shaykh Yaser tell us the story of a brother. How he missed his family so much and they were only gone for a week. For, he has never been away from his family for that long. He would gather all the brothers after Isha and they would spend time together with him. When he was asked what are you planning for the return of your family, he became perplexed.

He says, "What don't they have, check their closets, their rooms, what do they have that I have not given"

He simply did not understand why that was necessary. After some convincing he bought his children chocolates and gave it to them at the airport. The children were so touched they said "Oh daddy, we won't leave you again, don't worry we love you" etc. etc. ;)

Flowers, he left for his wife in the room.

His beloved wife enters their room.

Wife: "Come here"
Husband: "Yes?"

Wife: " Who told you to do this? "
Husband: "No one"

After the conversation goes on for a while, the husband explains it was to show how much he missed her.

This just goes to show, how simple gifts at the right moment could emphasize love and appreciation that years do not.

By the way, the wife to our knowledge, has never removed those flowers.

May Allah protect and preserve that family.

May Allah make us all awaken and show this love for our families, inshaAllah.


in the end, Allahu Allam ;)

mytemuslim
02-12-2007, 09:58 AM
-The first child is for your training
The second child is for you to train
The third child TRAINS YOU ;-)

-Ibn Mas'ud used to say: `If I had but ten days left to live, I would like to marry, so as not to meet God as a celibate.'

-The Shaikh mentioned the Bumper sticker he saw "Yes I'm the head of the household, my wife said I could be that!"

-If you can devote 5 minutes to your wife everyday, then it will be enough (inshaAllah).

Question is asked about divorce
Shaikh Yasir: (thoughtful look)"This class is about love, not hate."


-Don't say "Shaikh says love is halal, go love everybody!"

-Couples start on the love seat, and eventually end up on the sofa

-Instead of Valentine's Day, we should have Ibn Hazm's (r) day

And my favorite gem for now at least
-The daughter of Sa'id bin Al-Musayyib(rh) to her new husband:
"Sit down I'll give you the knowledge of Sa'id"

May Allah bless us with righteous spouses and preserve the righteous ulema for the benefit of this Ummah. Ameen.

Afiya
02-12-2007, 10:17 AM
Marriage is like a bird with 2 wings... You need strong wings to fly high... wings of Love and Mercy...Over time the bird gets old and the wings get weak... In order to stay strong, you need to maintain a balance between the two (Muwadda wa rahma) ...

fawzias
02-12-2007, 10:22 AM
"Love is neither disapproved by religion nor prohibited by the law...for every heart is in Allah swt's hands." -Ibn Hazm

fawzias
02-12-2007, 10:25 AM
After Aisha[ra] would drink from a cup of glass, the Prophet[s] would retrace where her lips drank from and he[s] drank from the same place. =)

fawzias
02-12-2007, 10:27 AM
Love will stay one of the most marvelous creations of Allah swt. This is one of the infinite secrets of love.

Afiya
02-12-2007, 10:39 AM
Dont keep withdrawing from the Bank of Love without making deposits and always be aware of your balance.

Addeen un Naseehah
02-12-2007, 12:22 PM
The most beautiful thing is that the fact that Prophet of Allah SAW Had nine wives and yet he never was busy enough to not keep them happy.

Husbands these days having single wife are too busy to give them any happiness.

Shaikh Yasir: "He was a considerate man...with his wives"

QueenGagger
02-12-2007, 12:54 PM
when a man and woman get married, the man loses his bachelors and the woman gains her masters

Ammar AlShukry
02-12-2007, 01:37 PM
Brothers enter marriages and immediately expect to command the same sort of respect that their fathers commanded. It doesn't work like that. Both spouses may come into the marriage trying to replicate the successful pattern that their individual parents had, but they need to come up with their own pattern for their own marrriage to be successful.

Ammar AlShukry
02-12-2007, 01:43 PM
Prophet Muhammad had guests, and Aisha had started cooking for them. In the meantime, a servant had brought food from the house of Hafsa. Aisha struck the plate and it fell, scattering the food on the ground. Prophet Muhammad (S) smiled and said: "Your mother Aisha is jealous"



Lesson: She destroyed food in front of the guests of her husband. How many men would have taken that as an act of disrespect worthy of at least one divorce? Not all actions that women do are intended to disrespect the husband as much as they are to express their emotions..So if it isn't an act of war don't take it as such.

Ammar AlShukry
02-12-2007, 01:58 PM
Prophet Muhammad vowed to stay away from his wives for an entire month.

When he came back after 29 days of seclusion, Aisha greeted him back by saying : "The month is not over yet"


Prophet Muhammad (S) said, "The month can be 29 days or 30 days" Showing with his hand.

Ammar AlShukry
02-12-2007, 02:02 PM
Aisha used to say the last thing that entered the Prophet's (S) stomach was her saliva.

Ammar AlShukry
02-12-2007, 02:03 PM
The wives of the Prophet (S) sent Fatimah as an intermediary between them and the Prophet (S), to ask the Prophet to be just with them regarding Aisha. The Prophet (S) told Fatimah, "Do you not love what I love?" She said "Yes" He said, "Then love her (Aisha)"

HiBz EsSenSe ©
02-12-2007, 04:39 PM
Prophet Muhammad had guests, and Aisha had started cooking for them. In the meantime, a servant had brought food the house of Aisha. Aisha struck the plate and it fell, scattering the food on the ground. Prophet Muhammad (S) smiled and said: "Your mother Aisha is jealous"

Lesson: She destroyed food in front of the guests of her husband. How many men would have taken that as an act of disrespect worthy of at least one divorce? Not all actions that women do are intended to disrespect the husband as much as they are to express their emotions..So if it isn't an act of war don't take it as such.
The Lesson is a gem on its own...

HiBz EsSenSe ©
02-12-2007, 04:41 PM
"One of the reasons Brothers get married is for "Jihad of the Nafs" .. Sisters, Prepare for battle "

HiBz EsSenSe ©
02-12-2007, 04:42 PM
Based on how much a couple compromises, determines how long their loving relationship will last

HiBz EsSenSe ©
02-12-2007, 04:45 PM
After Aisha[ra] would drink from a cup of glass, the Prophet[s] would retrace where her lips drank from and he[s] drank from the same place. =) while looking in her eyes, sallah Allahu aleyhi wasalam http://forums.almaghrib.org/images/icons/icon12.gif

HiBz EsSenSe ©
02-12-2007, 05:14 PM
a person shouldn't be blamed for experiencing love, Love is a sign of perfection & if you dont experience it, you're not a natural human being ..

...You might as well eat hay because you're a donkey
¿does any1 remembr who said that last line?

HijabiByNature
02-12-2007, 06:11 PM
Maintaining Love and Marital Life
"We must be willing to learn our Spouse's primary love language if we are to be effective communicators of Love."

Marriage doesn't kill love rather the "in-love" syndrome finishes and the real love begins.The relationship transforms. Love is not just a feeling but also an action.

Love is something one cannot control rather its in the hands of Allaah (swt). But the actions that one takes after falling in love is by choice and will be held accountable.

HiBz EsSenSe ©
02-12-2007, 08:02 PM
For every brother who marries a sister overseas, a sister is left here unmarried ...Do the Math !

asyed
02-12-2007, 08:32 PM
A Husband is the Wife's 1st Baby!

asyed
02-12-2007, 08:42 PM
Why was Hawa’ created from the rib?


Allahu Alam


Shaykh Yasir: Allah didn't create her from the head as to be above the man, nor from his feet to be below the man, but from the ribs so she would be close to his heart and under his protection.

asyed
02-12-2007, 09:16 PM
Can it be Haram to marry?

Yes: Haram – If one is not financial and physical able to and/or believes that he will mistreat his wife (financially, physically, emotionally).

asyed
02-12-2007, 09:21 PM
Nobody's got it all (looks, money, religiousness, education, family, visa :), personality, status, other qualities that you can think of) so compromise.

asyed
02-12-2007, 09:27 PM
Are Men & Women Equal in Islam?

Yes, in some areas.
Unequal is other areas,
But FAIRNESS prevails in all areas!

Faizan
02-12-2007, 09:30 PM
A Husband is the Wife's 1st Baby!


masha'Allah that is the funniest thing ive read in a while... but we would probably be babyish on purpose... who doesnt want to be "pampered" by their wife...

asyed
02-12-2007, 09:30 PM
Food fight between Aisha and Sauda (ra)

asyed
02-12-2007, 09:34 PM
Some of the wives of Rasulullah (saw) were nagging him... Umar (ra) walks in... they all become quite (ra)...

Umar says: arent you ashamed that you are silent when I walk in yet you nag to Rasulullah...

Some one replied: he is merciful and you are a tuff man!

spana3rabia
02-12-2007, 09:39 PM
^LOL! is love notes even comin to hosna?

asyed
02-12-2007, 11:16 PM
^LOL! is love notes even comin to hosna?
You better wish it does... Shaykh Yasir was much more open/informal in this class than in FOL.

I think 90% was covered in FOL. It's just the way it is covered that is different.

Abdur Rahman Mirza
02-13-2007, 11:34 AM
Assalamu 'alaikum,

sorry for taking too long for a gem, but a few that i remember,

Gem 1: the way the sheikh described the end of the Prophet's life made tears come to some people's eyes, to make us cry during any al-maghrib session is a gem in its own right, in fact i thought the best session in al-maghrib i have ever taken was "the life of Rasulullah," in love notes,

Gem 2: Personally derived "Love is one of the signs of Allah. Therefore, it is a part of his Ruboobiyah. Therefore, it is a part of Aqeedah." Therfore it become obligatory on Brother "Aqeedah" to comment on it...

Gem 3:Everytime your wife shops, she does not necessarily want to buy the item, sometimes she just wants to share the way it looks with you. But the first thing men do when they shop is look at the watch. And when their wife shows them something, they look at the price tag.

Wassalam,

A.R. "Aqeedah"

Abdur Rahman Mirza
02-13-2007, 11:37 AM
Assalamu 'alaikum,



Umar says: arent you ashamed that you are silent when I walk in yet you nag to Rasulullah...

Some one replied: he is merciful and you are a tuff man!
actually, i think the shaikh said, "...and you are a rude man." lol,

Wassalam,

A.R.

Yaser Birjas
02-13-2007, 03:58 PM
This is a wonderful thread and beautiful read...keep your gems coming
:)

Al-Amanah
02-13-2007, 11:12 PM
^LOL! is love notes even comin to hosna?Don't know...but it sure is comin' to Hayl inshAllah.

Can't wait to see you here Sh. Yaser

PS: Don't forget about Hajj =) inshAllah ;)

SiBgha_z
02-14-2007, 12:17 PM
Men are motivated and empowered when they feel their wives need them, while women are empowered when they feel cherished. http://forums.almaghrib.org/images/icons/icon7.gif

spana3rabia
02-14-2007, 02:27 PM
^how do we know this. whats the daleel. who and how did they come to this conclusion? just out of curiosity, coz i always hear these blanket statements about men and women...and its like, who said all women are like this and all men are like that.

so perhaps if i hear/understand the reasoning for that particular statement, it'll make much more sense to me/. bi idhnillah :)

SiBgha_z
02-14-2007, 02:48 PM
^how do we know this. whats the daleel. who and how did they come to this conclusion? just out of curiosity, coz i always hear these blanket statements about men and women...and its like, who said all women are like this and all men are like that.

so perhaps if i hear/understand the reasoning for that particular statement, it'll make much more sense to me/. bi idhnillah :)

Psychology of Men & Women By Shaykh Yasir Birjas http://forums.almaghrib.org/images/icons/icon10.gif

[Don't get me wrong, it's not a title of a book or anything. But this is one of the things he said]

I can totally understand this statement. Obv we have to keep in mind that even though these are general, it is not to say they apply to each and every individual.
On the other hand, I've seen it first hand. Men become more involved when you show them you need them. The more you [as a wife] take everything on your own, your husband thinks since you have everything under control, you don't need him to be around as much.

So the less you need him=the more football he watches ::gags::

And women, well needless to say, become all the more motivated to work on the relationship when they see their husbands caring for them ex: giving gifts, or spending "even 5 minutes without any interruption/interference from anyone" (as someone mentioned in the class).

I hope that clears it up a bit.

spana3rabia
02-14-2007, 04:35 PM
oh isee jazakAllahu kheiran for the explanation.

nihma333
02-14-2007, 10:24 PM
"Does the Lover think that his LOVE can be concealed while his heart is shedding tears, and his heart is GLOWING..." ~ Part of the Burdah

nihma333
02-14-2007, 10:29 PM
Men talk to relay information.... Women talk to build relationships.

nihma333
02-14-2007, 10:33 PM
If a person is obsessed with love (or their lover) so that his/her religious duties are neglected, then that love is a sickness that NEEDS to be treated!

SiBgha_z
02-14-2007, 11:01 PM
Once people get married, reality kicks in and they don't compromise, things start falling apart. Go over the signs that maintain the "in love" syndrome.

SiBgha_z
02-14-2007, 11:04 PM
Be bi-lingual in the language of Love.

nihma333
02-15-2007, 12:14 AM
The eye is the gate to the soul and the first sign of LOVE is the brooding gaze...women are MUCH BETTER at reading the eyes, so don't even try to lie to them.

^^^^ "And a man is not like a woman" ^^^^ straight fact from the Mother of Maryam...... nuff saidhttp://forums.almaghrib.org/images/icons/icon7.gif

Sirius1
02-15-2007, 12:16 AM
Men are like rubberbands, they need their time to stretch out alone and bounce back.

Women are like waves, up & down they go (emotions)...beware sometimes they come in the form of tsunami's.



*rubberbands are useful to keep objects together
*waves are half the beauty of the oceanVery profound and beautiful! :) Jazakallah for sharing.

mytemuslim
02-15-2007, 04:46 PM
Salaam,
I just wanted to share a link I found while typing up and completing my notes for the class. InshaAllah I'll share them as soon as possible, but I found this useful site. http://notes-to-go.blogspot.com/search/label/AlMaghrib%3A%20LoveNotes-Marriage%20and%20Family%20Life

SiBgha_z
02-15-2007, 05:46 PM
Salaam,
I just wanted to share a link I found while typing up and completing my notes for the class. InshaAllah I'll share them as soon as possible, but I found this useful site. http://notes-to-go.blogspot.com/search/label/AlMaghrib%3A%20LoveNotes-Marriage%20and%20Family%20Life
Wow. MashaAllah awesome website. JazakAllah Khair http://forums.almaghrib.org/images/icons/icon7.gif

mytemuslim
02-15-2007, 07:20 PM
I was going through my notes and I came across this for Saturday's stuff
The Shaikh warned us "Now don't go say 'The Shaikh says love is halal, go love everybody!"

asyed
02-16-2007, 02:23 PM
Assalamu 'alaikum,


actually, i think the shaikh said, "...and you are a rude man." lol,

Wassalam,

A.R.
Yeah he did say rude man, but I didnt have the courage to put that in there... because rude is 100% of the times negative, while "tuff" could be possitve or negative... Allahu Alam.

mytemuslim
02-16-2007, 03:06 PM
InshaAllah it is my hope to type up all my notes and post them so Tayybah can be known to have the highest Love Notes GPA. However I'm not an arab and I'm 95% sure I messed up on the names of the books. Like Kitabul Qiyyam by Al Jahaad etc. May Allah protect the ulema and grant sakinah to the Ummah ameen.

mytemuslim
02-16-2007, 04:30 PM
Oh yea I forgot (and now I remembered)
Shaikh Yasir: When Aisha (radiaAllah anha) won the race did she say <shaikh in a serious, humble voice>, "i won" ?? You had to be there...

nihma333
02-16-2007, 04:58 PM
Shaikh Yasir: When Aisha (radiaAllah anha) won the race did she say <shaikh in a serious, humble voice>, "i won" ?? You had to be there...
Honestly, that was one of Sunday's highlights... especially how Shaykh Yasir Birjas stretched out his arm and said "I won" with the most serious facial expression everrr....

Ammar AlShukry
02-16-2007, 06:02 PM
yoooo...


Who is going to OUTGEM ME???



sorry this 8 page thread isn't tayybah worthy yet.. and definitely not with that houstonian, rhode islander having the most posts in it..

Ammar AlShukry
02-16-2007, 06:08 PM
Imam Az-zuhri said:

“The first love story ever known in the history of Islam was the love of Rasulullah (S) for Aisha, and Masrouq used to call her The love of Rasulullah (S)

Ammar AlShukry
02-16-2007, 06:10 PM
Why is Romeo and Juliets love story so famous? Because they died.



Their love was never put to the real test.....marriage

Ammar AlShukry
02-16-2007, 06:16 PM
Who was better Khadijah or Aisha?

Incomparable...Both were indespensable for the da'wah of Muhammad (S).


Khadijah supported him in Mecca with her wealth, Aisha supported him and the Ummah after Rasul Allah's (S) death with her knowledge.

Ammar AlShukry
02-16-2007, 06:19 PM
It is very dangerous for people to watch tv shows and movies that depict homosexuality in a positive (or funny) light. Because the least that will happen, even if you believe that it is wrong, is that you become a little more desensitized to it, and the faahishah becomes more acceptable to your heart

Ammar AlShukry
02-16-2007, 06:23 PM
Sheikh Yaser was asked about it being permissible to lie to your wife, he said something like

Say for example your wife cooks something for you, and it turns out not as great as she wanted it. You can still say ma sha Allah, tabarak ALlah, I have NEVER tasted anything like this...and that's not a lie because you really haven't. :D

-oh clever truth telling

UmA
02-16-2007, 07:06 PM
in caring for your weeping child, there is more reward than praying an entire nite of qiyaam ul lail



sounds wonderful, what's the reference for that

mytemuslim
02-16-2007, 11:42 PM
I could have outgemmed Maalik, but i figured I wanted to be neater and post as many gems in one post rather than spreading them out. Besides I don't want to outgem Maalik. He was gemming way back in '02-'03 and what not....The good ol' days.

mytemuslim
02-16-2007, 11:44 PM
sounds wonderful, what's the reference for thatAs salaamu alaikum,
Shaikh Yasir told us at Love Notes that Ibnul Qayyim said those words of which you asked :-). May Allah bless our families. Ameen.

asyed
02-17-2007, 09:33 PM
yoooo...


Who is going to OUTGEM ME???



sorry this 8 page thread isn't tayybah worthy yet.. and definitely not with that houstonian, rhode islander having the most posts in it..
Insha Allah the competition is on Ameer Saab...!!!

Insha Allah check this thread in 72 hrs.

asyed
02-17-2007, 09:59 PM
It was common practice to marry widows in the past (in contrast to how this protrayed today among the muslims)

This is a serious social problem. These sisters deserve a companion too!

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:02 PM
dont say: "whats cookin, good lookin" when your wife is mad! :)

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:03 PM
Even the wives of the prophet (saw) didnt call him by his name! Subhan Allah.

Because the Quran says that we should not adress the His (saw) as we address other people.

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:05 PM
Who remembers the full text for the Umar (ra) story: I am escaping from one Qadr to another Qadr


That was a gem in itself! :)

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:08 PM
Why is the bond of marriage mithaqan galeeda or a very strong covenant?

One of the reasons is that you are basing your contract upon the name of Allah.

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:12 PM
When a person is looking to get married... it is not just about “Me and Her” – the whole family and society is effected... You've got the inner circle... the immediate family... the outer circle of cousins and a lot of people in between.


Islam is not an individualistic way of life... it is a very communal life style.

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:19 PM
Married men should be working men... Not work-a-holic men...

Family time is important... Once someone told me they tried Islamic boardgame... It works for them.

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:20 PM
Why do women keep their names in Islam?

Marriage in Islam is a partnership, not an ownership!

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:23 PM
Barter Marriages (give me your sister, for my sister), Temporary Marriages, Group Intercourse was very common in Pre-Islamic Arab culture...

Thank Allah for Islam!!!!!!!!!

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:27 PM
If you have multiple wives be very careful and try your best to be fair in treatment...

Otherwise you will come on Day of Judgement with your shoulder leaning on one side,

asyed
02-17-2007, 10:33 PM
Why do people get married:

o Protect yourself from zina – by seeking halal physical pleasure

o Seeking the pleasure of the prophet saw - by following his sunnah

o Want to have children – Zeenat of this life – happiness of this world

o Seeking the intersession of the ritious child

o Freeing some time form the responsibilities of this life (Man free time from putting kids in bed, woman free from having to go and work)

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 10:46 PM
Signs of being In Love...or the In Love Syndrome:
1) brooding gaze
2)lover directs attention towards loved one, while in the company of more than one person
3)lover hurries to the spot wherever beloved is to be
4)lover feels sudden confusion and excitement when beloved is near
5)lover is excited to be in close quarters with beloved
6)like to play tug of war (ex. newlyweds play tug of war with dish towel)
7)leaning sideways into beloved or supporting themselves with beloved
8)when talking to beloved, extend hand towards them
9)drink out of the same cup, from the same spot of beloved's lips
10)opposites do attract...do not forget beauty is in the eye of the beholder

***lover here only means the one who is in love with another****

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:01 PM
2 theories on Love

Theory #1)Love Tank Theory:
Love is like a vehicle which in which women feel insecure about how much gas is in the car and frequently stop to top off the tank before the needle hits the halfway point before Empty. Men feel more confidant and continue driving until the needle hits the E...

Theory #2) Don't keep withdrawing without depositing

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:04 PM
What Harms Love:
1) exploitation of Love...ex) if u loved me u would _______________.
2)infidelity
3)slander(of women)
4)long unnecessary separation
5)technology (do not have a tv in the bedroom...it is death to the marriage)

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:09 PM
For Men the general shariah ruling:
Marriage is WAJIB when a man has the ability to care, provide for women and is afraid he will commit haram if he doesn't.
Marriage is HARAM if a man does not have the physical or financial ability to care for his wife, AND/OR he fears he will mistreat his wife.
Marriage is MAKROOH if a man has the financial ability but fears he will mistreat his wife.

**Ibn Hazim said Marriage is FARD once a man is financially stable**

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:13 PM
Reccomendations for finding a spouse:
1)religion-righteous character
2)fertility
3)virginity
4)contentment-men to be humble and for women to lower unreasonable expectations
5)beauty-in the eye of the beholder
6)Age difference-men should be older than women (5 years) so they can mature to the woman's level
7)easy dowry

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:18 PM
A woman came to the Prophet (SAW) and told him that her father was forcing her to marry his nephew (her cousin) in order to elevate his status. The Prophet (SAW) told her that it was her choice so she told him that she would marry her cousin because she wanted to...she just wanted it to be known that women can choose who they marry

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:22 PM
#1 reason for discord in marriage is the shaitan

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:25 PM
The Prophet(SAW) said to Al Sayeda Aisha (RA) I know when u are satisfied with me u say "no wa rabb Muhammed", when u are not u say "no wa rabb Ibrahim"...she said "I love u but I did not want to say your name"...cuz she was upset with him

QueenGagger
02-18-2007, 11:31 PM
Application of Love Notes:
My dad was upset with my mom and she came to me for advice (knowing i was fresh of love notes) i explained to her the rubberband theory as well as the wave theory...she decided to leave him alone and the next morning they weres sitting on the couch like lovebirds...alhamdulilah

Hala
02-19-2007, 12:00 PM
Sheikh Yaser was asked about it being permissible to lie to your wife, he said something like

Say for example your wife cooks something for you, and it turns out not as great as she wanted it. You can still say ma sha Allah, tabarak ALlah, I have NEVER tasted anything like this...and that's not a lie because you really haven't. :D

-oh clever truth tellingThis one's hilarious!

Hala
02-19-2007, 12:09 PM
I am even MORE pumped for Love Notes now...and I didn't think that was even possible.
7 more weeks in shaa Allah!!

mytemuslim
02-19-2007, 06:26 PM
I do not know if anyone posted this Gem yet but I just came across it
"Allah created us to complete each other, NOTto compete with each other.

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:05 PM
Even a small gift from the heart satisfies your wife…

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:10 PM
I really loved that hadith when a man tried to force her daughter to marry her cousin... she took him to the prophet (saw)... He (saw) said you cant force her to marry someone she doesnt want to... Then the daughter says NOW I agree to marry him...

She said she wanted others to know that fathers dont have the right to force their daughters to marry anyone...

Because of her brave soul and because of her pure intentions we have this lesson... even 1400+ years later!!!!!!!!!!!!

I thought that was so cool! Subhan Allah

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:13 PM
I also loved that story when Abdullah ibn abi Wadiya, a student of Saad ibn Musayab was given his teachers daughter in marriage....

In the morning he is about to go to his class... she is like... where do you think you are going... sit down and I will teach you!!! Subhan Allah

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:16 PM
In women matters (generally speaking), there is only need of one woman witness and it maybe stronger than a man's...

That story of the marriage between a guy and a girl who were brother and sister in breast feeding... the women's single witness caused prophet (saw) to tell them to divorce.

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:19 PM
Sisters better read this one!

A women's obidence to her husband is so crucial that it takes precedence even over obeying the father!!! (this is in halal matters of course).

Subhan Allah

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:20 PM
Women will enter hell because they deny any good that their husband has done for them...

Shaykh gave an example: You have never done anything good for me.

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:23 PM
Some Rights of the Wife:

· Treating her in a kind and good manner

· Teaching her the matters of the religion

· Helping her maintaining her chastity – meaning if she wants you to sexually please her, you should do it

· Financially maintaining her – in addition to spending on the house – but to his limits

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:26 PM
What's the number 1 reason for marital discord?

Shaytaan! Marital discord is one of the most pleasing actions to shaytaan.

So seek protection from shaytaan people.

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:28 PM
Under languages of love Shaykh mentioned that:


Aisha (ra) used to say Rabbu Muhammad (saw) when she was happy with him and she used to say Rabbu Ibrahim when mad at him (saw)...

Next time notice what people say... and the way they say it.

asyed
02-19-2007, 10:31 PM
When women are stressed out or afraid they want to talk to get it out of their system...

Men want to be along in times of stress... silence and seclusion.

What happends when a couple gets stressed out at the same time? The wife should give some "alone time" to the husband and the husband should lend an ear to the wife.

mytemuslim
02-20-2007, 06:54 PM
I don't believe I've seen this one yet
Shaikh Yasir : To not be needed is a slow death for men.

fi'sabillilah_inshaAllah
02-25-2007, 08:43 PM
MashaAllah! such an awessommeee threaad. keep it up Tayybah!

Nida A.
02-26-2007, 10:35 AM
The best marriages are those that follow the Prophet's (s.a.w) example...

Imtiaz
03-05-2007, 02:21 PM
*scratches head* ...I think the Rhode Islander won...

fawzias
03-06-2007, 08:36 PM
this is going to help a a lot of people, including myself. may Allah swt reward you immensely for posting this up. ameen.

nihma333
03-08-2007, 12:24 PM
this is going to help a a lot of people, including myself. may Allah swt reward you immensely for posting this up. ameen.
word up, Ameen!