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K78
12-25-2008, 01:40 PM
As Salam Alaikum

Doesn't a wife know her man better than any other person?
Okay so if a woman thinks her husband is not so religious can she divorce him?
because she doesn't want him to be her husband in jannat because he is not so religious.

bint_habibullah
12-25-2008, 02:57 PM
Wa 'alaikum as salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu ukhtee. :)

Well, to be honest, I don't know what "he is not so religious means." That could mean anything from he is not praying to "he's not interested in learning X about the deen."

Whatever the case may be I believe we, who do not know the situation of the sister in question, cannot give honest and good naseeha. It would be better to ask someone around your parts who has knowledge and is experienced these things. That individual may be able to help more than us. InshaAllah.

Divorce is not a light matter. She should really think these through and seek help from those who have experience in the matter. Most people here are either not wed or are newly married. I do not think 95% of the people here can draw from experience.

The one thing I do recommend is istikhara. When in doubt, consult your Rabb! :D

That is my advise to you. :) InshaAllah.

brother_bruce
12-25-2008, 04:46 PM
because she doesn't want him to be her husband in jannat because he is not so religious.if, by some twist of fate, he does become her husband in jannah, then the sister's concern presupposes he was good enough to make it in jannah in the first place.

Paradise is pure, and will accept only those who are pure.

If the husband makes it to jannah, then he was probably more religious than originally given credit for.

If the husband really is unreligious and doesnt end up making it to jannah, then the sister has nothing to fear.

In either case, the sister should ask herself if being 'unreligious' is a grounds for divorce (and besides... what does it mean, really... that he's just lazy? ignorant? a fasiq? kafir?)

maybe if the sister is the one who thinks she's more religous, she can try to mend her husband and bring him back to the straight path... thus getting even more ajr and raising her own ranks in Paradise; via every right action he does afterward.


فَلاَ تُزَكُّواْ أَنفُسَكُمْ هُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِمَنِ اتَّقَى

So, ascribe not purity to yourselves. He knows best him who has Taqwa.

K78
12-25-2008, 06:54 PM
thanks for you peoples advices.

K78
12-25-2008, 07:01 PM
maybe she should become a rebel that should straighten him out hahaha!

Fa'izoon
12-31-2008, 10:40 AM
I know of a sister in this situation; she isn't actually married to the brother yet but she's deciding whether to accept or decline his proposal.

Should one knowingly walk into a situation like that though? Where a brother is a really nice person, and would care and look after his wife yet lacks in his knowledge or application of the Deen? In that situation would it really be worth going into it looking to earn ajr by perhaps helping him increase his practice?

I know my fear would be, what if he gets caught up in the Duniya and never actually does increase in his practice? Another sister mentioned that in her experience, brothers find it much easier to marry lesser practicing women and then helping them increase whereas sisters struggle to do the same...

I know this situation is different, as the individual mentioned is considering divorce from someone...I felt the principles were similar. Allahu 'alim :)

Faizan
01-02-2009, 08:21 PM
haha get to jannah... you won't worry trust me.

Um Tammer
01-05-2009, 11:21 AM
People do change over time.

Naima Abdulkadir
01-12-2009, 10:25 PM
I think 'religious' means something different to everyone. Fulfilling the waajib and Allah's commandments and having a good character are the two most important things to look at. But if it's something minor, then I would remember that everyone has shortcomings and everyone has their own struggles. Pray istikharah, and inshaAllah you won't regret your decision.

I think sometimes we sisters can get caught up in minor stuff and can get picky, so this is a reminder to me first.

Can't say anything for post marriage simply because I'm not married. Maybe someone else can add.