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Abu Zayna
01-14-2009, 02:17 PM
Presently there is a little problem with my wife to be insha Allah. The thing is she's tyuding in uni and when she graduates in a year's time her mum wants her to work in a company that surrounds fitnah because some of her co-workers will be non-mahrem men. u know basically a free-mix joint. Alhamdulilah she has haya and hates to be around non mahrem guys. But she's telling me that her mum wants to work after the graduation. Alhamdulilah i wil be able to provide her with not just her basic nedds and wants. I can also provide her with her own business so the work thing is not a proiroty. And her parents might prevent me from marrying her if i say she wil not work after uni. And i can't lie to them by saying i'll allow that and after our marriage i will say she aint working at all. Ahl Sunnah wal jamaa'ah are people of integrity and dignity and they also keep their words as well. Any suggestions!

Rizak
01-14-2009, 03:41 PM
Well, technically she can find a different job that doesn't need her to be around non-Mahram men. If she really wants a job where she doesn't have to worry about any of that she can try an Islamic school or something similar.

Maybe some sisters can recommend certain jobs or careers.

Allahu Allim.

Abu Zayna
01-15-2009, 01:45 PM
Do her parents specifically want her to work in a mixed environment or just in a specific field which happens to usually be mixed? If the latter option, she can try to find a working place in which the team and co-workers are mostly female.
They want her in a specific field. Alhamdulilaah w always want is best for both of us in this life n the hereafter. We agree in regards to our decisions and position together.

Al Musafir
01-17-2009, 09:48 PM
I think this is a difficult situation to be in, especially if a sister goes through rigorous graduate school education. (for instance: medicine).

Is she willing to not work after marriage? If that's the case then you might not have to worry so much after marriage inshaAllah.

Abu Zayna
01-19-2009, 08:00 AM
I think this is a difficult situation to be in, especially if a sister goes through rigorous graduate school education. (for instance: medicine).

Is she willing to not work after marriage? If that's the case then you might not have to worry so much after marriage inshaAllah.
No she prefers to stay at home and emulate the real Muslimah who know the khayr and importance of staying at home and taking good care of their family. They also hate going out reguarly, so they don't become fitnah for men who are out there i the streets.

Bright Star
01-23-2009, 06:01 PM
However, having said this, if you look at the history of Islam, many prominent Muslim women have worked and played a great deal of importance in Muslim society. I could mention here one noble lady, Khadija ra the wife of the Prophet pbuh. Did she not have to deal with people, including men in her business? Did the prophet's mosque have a wall between men and women? How did they achieve piety while they had to go out and do service for the sake of Allah? During battle time, there were both men and women participants. And who would nurse the wounded? It would have to be anyone available who could and it didn't always happen that women were treated by women and men by men. I am sure you can find hadith where male and female nurses had to take care of the sick despite their gender, and dress their wounds.

Now just imagine that all Muslim women said they didn't want to go out to work and relied on men, what would happen if let's say the husband is made redundant, or he is sick, or if there is war, or if the society needs people to work in order to help the community. What if a female has no mahram and no one to support her?

I can not see anywhere in the Quran or sunnah where it forbids women from working with people. I'll be totally honest, as a woman myself I hate to go out to work and yes I agree that rubbing shoulders with men is definitely a "no, no", but there are work places where it's not so crowded and women are respected and are given their space. If a woman is strong enough then she can assert with her body language and firm mater of fact tone of voice that sexual harresment will never be tolerated. I really believe if a women is dressed decently and is self aware and confident she has more chance of being respected and treated respectfully in any eventuality of a crisis. Having said this choosing a good place to work is also vital. A Muslim sister should take care of where she chooses to work. Perhaps in a Muslim country there are opportunities for her to work amongst females if this is what you would both rather prefer.



That is really good advice sister, mashallah.
And you're right, communication with non-mahram is inevitable and unavoidable most of the times.

zuhair.shaath
01-24-2009, 07:26 AM
No she prefers to stay at home and emulate the real Muslimah who know the khayr and importance of staying at home and taking good care of their family. They also hate going out reguarly, so they don't become fitnah for men who are out there i the streets.
I think some good premarital material would be to listen or study the lives of the wives of the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasalam and the female companions.